Girlfriend how many of you have been through or is going through The Mid-20 CONFUSION.
Something Happens when you Reach around 25 years old.
it's Like a quarter life Crisis.
Your Still Considered Young but your Far from a Teenager.
You still want to Club and Party like a 19 year old Rock Star but your Conscious is telling you its time to BUCKLE DOWN... time to start making better decision and securing the rest of your life.
Then around 25 at this point at least 1 or 2 of your Girlfriends have children and you can not help but to wonder" AM I SUPPOSE TO BE HAVING BABIES TOO?"
Then there is your love life.... when your growing up as a little girl... you think by the time your 25 you'll be married to Prince Charming , living in a big house with a white picket fence and twin babies. BUT SURE AS SHIT STINKS...reality sets in and you have to take into consideration how many FROGS you have to kiss before you meet your Mr. Right.
And a lot of the times you still haven't Found him by the time you reach your Mid-20's.
Your career also comes into play.... while growing up you think... go to college... get a degree... equals a GREAT PAYING JOB.... *POW* sorry wrong answer... No one tells you about the entry level positions... the Horrible co-workers , the overbearing boss and the Sorry paycheck at the end of the week.
The fact is that before you can obtain your dream job in MOST circumstances you have to Pay your dues.
So Girlfriend I'm Just asking...
What do you do... when you see your Youth Slipping away but your NOT quiet where you want to be in life?
I think Everyone must go through this at least once in their lives....
In my point of view ... i think you must weigh your pro's and cons...
WHATS POSITIVE IN YOUR LIFE
Then look at your Cons
WHAT CAN I FIX ABOUT MYSELF AND MY SITUATION
and last
DON'T SWEAT THINGS THAT ARE OUT OF YOUR HANDS.
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
Girlfriend... Im just asking.. When you looking for a man.... does that include his babymama too?
Girlfriend I'm Just asking.... Does Baby mama Drama come with the territory of dating?
It seems like Now-a-days EVERYBODY got a kid.
with that said when your single and ready to mingle you find yourself bumping into more men with kids and fewer without --- What do you do?
Is this something that women need to get use to or should we Tie up our shoe laces and go on a MASSIVE MANHUNT for the small percentage of men over 25 years old without children.
In my opinion " the kids" aren't the problem.... Its everything that comes along with it.
First and foremost if your dating a man with a child ---get it through your head from jump honey... The number one spot in his life is already taken... you may be a STRONG second but...still not #1,
Secondly, if your a single woman without kids over the age of 24 ... More then likely your without children by choice so you have to look into yourself and see if being in a relationship with a pre-made family is what your looking for.
Last but FAR FROM LEAST.... the potential drama... Relationships are HARD enough as it is.... Do you really need to add a baby mama to the equation?
Not saying every baby mom is Crazy, Deranged and a stalker BUT we all know and have heard our share of HORROR stories.
So do you chance having to deal with some woman..shooting you the evil eye because your with the father of her child. Or using the child to do disrespectful things such as Dropping by your mans house unexpectedly or calling his phone real late.
And more then likely if she is confronted about it she'll say something like " The baby wanted to talk to him... The baby needed something".
Hmmmm.... I personally DON'T need no extra strain on my relationships...cause i can bring my own drama LMAO :)
So I'm just asking girlfriend... Is baby mama drama and kids apart of dating men in 2010?
It seems like Now-a-days EVERYBODY got a kid.
with that said when your single and ready to mingle you find yourself bumping into more men with kids and fewer without --- What do you do?
Is this something that women need to get use to or should we Tie up our shoe laces and go on a MASSIVE MANHUNT for the small percentage of men over 25 years old without children.
In my opinion " the kids" aren't the problem.... Its everything that comes along with it.
First and foremost if your dating a man with a child ---get it through your head from jump honey... The number one spot in his life is already taken... you may be a STRONG second but...still not #1,
Secondly, if your a single woman without kids over the age of 24 ... More then likely your without children by choice so you have to look into yourself and see if being in a relationship with a pre-made family is what your looking for.
Last but FAR FROM LEAST.... the potential drama... Relationships are HARD enough as it is.... Do you really need to add a baby mama to the equation?
Not saying every baby mom is Crazy, Deranged and a stalker BUT we all know and have heard our share of HORROR stories.
So do you chance having to deal with some woman..shooting you the evil eye because your with the father of her child. Or using the child to do disrespectful things such as Dropping by your mans house unexpectedly or calling his phone real late.
And more then likely if she is confronted about it she'll say something like " The baby wanted to talk to him... The baby needed something".
Hmmmm.... I personally DON'T need no extra strain on my relationships...cause i can bring my own drama LMAO :)
So I'm just asking girlfriend... Is baby mama drama and kids apart of dating men in 2010?
Saturday, May 22, 2010
Girlfriend... Im just asking...Do you know if he is into you?
GirlFriend I'm just Asking.... Do you know the signs that he is just not that into you??
So many beautiful and intelligent women don't know the signs....
First thing that you got to understand is... Just because you are an attractive woman doesn't mean you are every mans CUP OF TEA.
Trust me for the most part everyone has a type , physically and mentally so just cause you a Lil HOTTIE doesn't quiet secure you a spot with every man you set your eyes on.
Now that you understand that.... Here are some KEY things to take note of when dealing with a guy.
A.) How quickly does he respond to your Text , Email, Phone call, Instant message or BBM...
If a dude is into you he will always make time for you.... plain and simple if your a PRIORITY... he will act accordingly. I know, I know... everyone is busy now days. I should know I work two-jobs, a gym regiment, family and blog and if I'm into someone the moment they contact me i will at least take 30 seconds to respond to them in an appropriate manner.
When a dude is not into you.. you will notice... he takes hours to respond to text, phone calls or emails etc. And when he does respond you get a DRY answer.... Real short... nothing special.
B.) Have you met any of his family friends or anyone in his inner circle?
When you truly like someone -- you cant wait to introduce them to the IMPORTANT people in your life. best friends , family members and co-workers.
if you have been talking to a guy for some time and you haven't met anyone of some relevance-- then to him... your either replaceable.... no one of importance or he doesn't find you worthy enough to meet these people.. KEY SIGN that you are either the side chick or the shone.
C.) How are things in the bedroom.... The saying goes that the interaction in the bedroom is a true reflection of the relationship.
So if he is only having sex with you at his convenience.. and he really isn't pleasuring you.. it more of a YOU BETTER GET YOURS -- BEFORE I GET MINE type thing... honey he just ain't that into you.
If a man considers you his woman... He takes pleasure in satisfying your every need in the bedroom... But if he is just trying to beat you down and take you home... KEY SIGN you are just the jump off.
D.) LAST BUT NOT LEAST..... Does he know you? Does he know whats going on in your life?
If a man doesn't care about you.... more then likely he doesn't stay on the phone long enough or in your presence long enough.. to hear about your goals, struggles, good times or bad. Personally i think this is one of the most IMPORTANT signs in dating... If a man cares about you... he cares about ALL of you... so that means... he wants to hear about your day... he cares about ya future goals.. and he is interested in what makes you smile...
Now when you have been talking to a man for months and he cant name your favorite food, color, or perfume.... that's a problem.
Girlfriend.. you must know the SIGNS in DATING... so you are not left wondering.... why isn't this working out .. when the signs were right there from the beginning... you gotta see things for what they are .... and make the decision on whether that's what you want or not.
DON'T BE AFRAID TO LET GO!!!!
So many beautiful and intelligent women don't know the signs....
First thing that you got to understand is... Just because you are an attractive woman doesn't mean you are every mans CUP OF TEA.
Trust me for the most part everyone has a type , physically and mentally so just cause you a Lil HOTTIE doesn't quiet secure you a spot with every man you set your eyes on.
Now that you understand that.... Here are some KEY things to take note of when dealing with a guy.
A.) How quickly does he respond to your Text , Email, Phone call, Instant message or BBM...
If a dude is into you he will always make time for you.... plain and simple if your a PRIORITY... he will act accordingly. I know, I know... everyone is busy now days. I should know I work two-jobs, a gym regiment, family and blog and if I'm into someone the moment they contact me i will at least take 30 seconds to respond to them in an appropriate manner.
When a dude is not into you.. you will notice... he takes hours to respond to text, phone calls or emails etc. And when he does respond you get a DRY answer.... Real short... nothing special.
B.) Have you met any of his family friends or anyone in his inner circle?
When you truly like someone -- you cant wait to introduce them to the IMPORTANT people in your life. best friends , family members and co-workers.
if you have been talking to a guy for some time and you haven't met anyone of some relevance-- then to him... your either replaceable.... no one of importance or he doesn't find you worthy enough to meet these people.. KEY SIGN that you are either the side chick or the shone.
C.) How are things in the bedroom.... The saying goes that the interaction in the bedroom is a true reflection of the relationship.
So if he is only having sex with you at his convenience.. and he really isn't pleasuring you.. it more of a YOU BETTER GET YOURS -- BEFORE I GET MINE type thing... honey he just ain't that into you.
If a man considers you his woman... He takes pleasure in satisfying your every need in the bedroom... But if he is just trying to beat you down and take you home... KEY SIGN you are just the jump off.
D.) LAST BUT NOT LEAST..... Does he know you? Does he know whats going on in your life?
If a man doesn't care about you.... more then likely he doesn't stay on the phone long enough or in your presence long enough.. to hear about your goals, struggles, good times or bad. Personally i think this is one of the most IMPORTANT signs in dating... If a man cares about you... he cares about ALL of you... so that means... he wants to hear about your day... he cares about ya future goals.. and he is interested in what makes you smile...
Now when you have been talking to a man for months and he cant name your favorite food, color, or perfume.... that's a problem.
Girlfriend.. you must know the SIGNS in DATING... so you are not left wondering.... why isn't this working out .. when the signs were right there from the beginning... you gotta see things for what they are .... and make the decision on whether that's what you want or not.
DON'T BE AFRAID TO LET GO!!!!
Monday, May 17, 2010
Girlfriend.... Im Just Asking.... Have you ever wished you could take your pussy back?
Girlfriend... I'm just asking... have you ever regretted sleeping with someone?
I'm pretty sure all women have gone through it or will go through this situation.
The situation in which if you could turn back the hands of time you would have kept your panties on. Well it happens to the BEST of us .... trust... me it is an unfortunate case of Trial and Error.
Sometimes as human beings we get caught up in Superficial stuff... that at the end of the day ain't worth shit. So We see this guy he is Physically attractive..... Or he seems to be Financially Stable or maybe he is the Hottest guy in the club, in your neighborhood or at work...and we focus on the stuff that has NO REAL SUBSTANCE and that's when the regret comes into play.
Sistahs we let these men into our bedrooms and between our legs because we are in love with their material or physical beauty before even getting to know him....
Ohhhh... he got a good job... and a nice car.... Let me give him some....
Ohhh... He got got a Great Body and good hair.... Let me give him some...
Ohhh.... Every girl in here is sweating him... but he is looking my way... Let me give him some...
These simple sometimes overlooked steps is how we end up selling ourselves short and regretting the next action....... SEX!!!!!!!
So what ! He's HOT and got a nice car... Turns out he's a DOUCHE BAG!!! Shit!.... now we're upset -- because we gave the goods to a selfish, self-centered, immature dude because he was 6'4 in a Range Rover....SMH!!
These are just some clear examples of the old school saying "EVERYTHING THAT GLITTERS AIN'T GOLD".....
Trust me I've learned the HARD way when it comes to these situations....
So... Girlfriend my advice to you is that.... Before you give up the cookies... make sure you really get to know him... because you could be Blinded by the Biceps and that will just leave you wondering.... Why did i give him some??? and... Damn! i wish i could get it back.
I'm pretty sure all women have gone through it or will go through this situation.
The situation in which if you could turn back the hands of time you would have kept your panties on. Well it happens to the BEST of us .... trust... me it is an unfortunate case of Trial and Error.
Sometimes as human beings we get caught up in Superficial stuff... that at the end of the day ain't worth shit. So We see this guy he is Physically attractive..... Or he seems to be Financially Stable or maybe he is the Hottest guy in the club, in your neighborhood or at work...and we focus on the stuff that has NO REAL SUBSTANCE and that's when the regret comes into play.
Sistahs we let these men into our bedrooms and between our legs because we are in love with their material or physical beauty before even getting to know him....
Ohhhh... he got a good job... and a nice car.... Let me give him some....
Ohhh... He got got a Great Body and good hair.... Let me give him some...
Ohhh.... Every girl in here is sweating him... but he is looking my way... Let me give him some...
These simple sometimes overlooked steps is how we end up selling ourselves short and regretting the next action....... SEX!!!!!!!
So what ! He's HOT and got a nice car... Turns out he's a DOUCHE BAG!!! Shit!.... now we're upset -- because we gave the goods to a selfish, self-centered, immature dude because he was 6'4 in a Range Rover....SMH!!
These are just some clear examples of the old school saying "EVERYTHING THAT GLITTERS AIN'T GOLD".....
Trust me I've learned the HARD way when it comes to these situations....
So... Girlfriend my advice to you is that.... Before you give up the cookies... make sure you really get to know him... because you could be Blinded by the Biceps and that will just leave you wondering.... Why did i give him some??? and... Damn! i wish i could get it back.
Monday, May 10, 2010
Girlfriend.... Im just asking.... What girl are you?
Girlfriend.... I'm just asking... What girl are you?
I was reading another online blog and it was EXTREMELY interesting and it was geared towards men.... and it spoke about different types of women and why men should stay away from them.
Girl# 1 is the " PERFECT 10"
She is so perfect that most men are wondering " WHY IS SHE SINGLE?"
This is the type of girl that has the beauty, has the personality, and what guys call " wifey" qualities. But this is where her flaws come into play... she probably has never been without a
boyfriend for more then a month at a time.. So she is CLINGY, NEEDY AND SPOILED.... and these qualities can morph into JEALOUSY and LACK OF TRUST if the man doesn't comply to her need to be in his face all the time.
Girl #2 is the "DRUNK & HOT GIRL" or " THE BAD GIRL"
She is the girl who knows all the hottest hang outs and clubs... If she isn't in the VIP... she isn't in the club. When you see her there is always a drink in her hand.... Her outfit is short , tight and revealing in all the right places. If you run her resume all her past relationships were with athletes, celebrities, or some sort of baller. She is the type of girl that steals the show when she walks into the room. But this girl... Shows no love .. she is an OPPORTUNIST... she only talks to men who can get her to the NEXT LEVEL... buy her the best things and break her off with no questions asked... She is Great to have on your arm but if you ain't talking $$$$$$ you might as well stop talking.
Girl #3 is "MISS I-N-D-E-P-E-N-D-E-N-T"
This chick is the girl who always had her own... and NEVER asked for anything from anybody...
She is the one who always had a job... always had the nicest things. Finished school and always been determined to be on her "A" game. She more then likely has the finer things in life and works HARD for them..And she seems "Perfect" but her issue is she is QUICK to tell a nigga she don't need him. Once her and her significant other get into a little spat -- she feels the need to remind him how far she has gotten without him and how much further she will get without him. these types of statements can hurt a mans ego. and that's why so many quote on quote OVERLY INDEPENDENT WOMEN are also single women.
Last but not least Girl #4 the " GIMME GIRL".
this is the sorriest of them all... She is the chick who is AVERAGE in every department... looks, personality and education. But for some reason she always has her hand out as is the world owes her something. But this girl always finds a FOOL to answer all her request. Usually these are the women who give the rest a bad name.. Lazy, Ignorant and Selfish... She has NOTHING to offer but wants to be catered too. SMDH!
Now in a nutshell maybe some ladies need to re-evaluate themselves and see what category they fit in... are you needy, are you a gold digger, are you TOO independent, or do you really have nothing to offer?
So my question is " Girlfriend ... which girl are you ?" and fellas which girls do you have in your past, present or attract?
I was reading another online blog and it was EXTREMELY interesting and it was geared towards men.... and it spoke about different types of women and why men should stay away from them.
Girl# 1 is the " PERFECT 10"
She is so perfect that most men are wondering " WHY IS SHE SINGLE?"
This is the type of girl that has the beauty, has the personality, and what guys call " wifey" qualities. But this is where her flaws come into play... she probably has never been without a
boyfriend for more then a month at a time.. So she is CLINGY, NEEDY AND SPOILED.... and these qualities can morph into JEALOUSY and LACK OF TRUST if the man doesn't comply to her need to be in his face all the time.
Girl #2 is the "DRUNK & HOT GIRL" or " THE BAD GIRL"
She is the girl who knows all the hottest hang outs and clubs... If she isn't in the VIP... she isn't in the club. When you see her there is always a drink in her hand.... Her outfit is short , tight and revealing in all the right places. If you run her resume all her past relationships were with athletes, celebrities, or some sort of baller. She is the type of girl that steals the show when she walks into the room. But this girl... Shows no love .. she is an OPPORTUNIST... she only talks to men who can get her to the NEXT LEVEL... buy her the best things and break her off with no questions asked... She is Great to have on your arm but if you ain't talking $$$$$$ you might as well stop talking.
Girl #3 is "MISS I-N-D-E-P-E-N-D-E-N-T"
This chick is the girl who always had her own... and NEVER asked for anything from anybody...
She is the one who always had a job... always had the nicest things. Finished school and always been determined to be on her "A" game. She more then likely has the finer things in life and works HARD for them..And she seems "Perfect" but her issue is she is QUICK to tell a nigga she don't need him. Once her and her significant other get into a little spat -- she feels the need to remind him how far she has gotten without him and how much further she will get without him. these types of statements can hurt a mans ego. and that's why so many quote on quote OVERLY INDEPENDENT WOMEN are also single women.
Last but not least Girl #4 the " GIMME GIRL".
this is the sorriest of them all... She is the chick who is AVERAGE in every department... looks, personality and education. But for some reason she always has her hand out as is the world owes her something. But this girl always finds a FOOL to answer all her request. Usually these are the women who give the rest a bad name.. Lazy, Ignorant and Selfish... She has NOTHING to offer but wants to be catered too. SMDH!
Now in a nutshell maybe some ladies need to re-evaluate themselves and see what category they fit in... are you needy, are you a gold digger, are you TOO independent, or do you really have nothing to offer?
So my question is " Girlfriend ... which girl are you ?" and fellas which girls do you have in your past, present or attract?
Tuesday, April 27, 2010
Girlfriend....Im Just asking... How big of a role does money play in a relationship...
Girlfriend... I'm just asking is it ALL about the cash??
A good friend of mine once said " Romance without Finance is a Nuisance"
THESE ARE THE WORDS THAT I LIVE BY....
In my opinion... As a hard working young woman it's hard to wrap your head around a broke man. you think wait a minute if I manage to wake up every morning work 1 or 2 jobs and go to school.. why cant you do the same?
I truly believe Money plays a big role in a relationship...
It cost to wine and dine--while dating.
Money is the number one reason for divorces in America.
Being stressed over bills can affect a relationship.
Men have always been made out to be the PROVIDERS...and i feel like that is something a man should do.
Needless to say ladies... if we want a man to Provide for us we must bring something to the table more then just laying on our back.
Another Reason i believe money plays a major role in relationships is the "STRUGGLE" of being broke. There is nothing like that feeling of living paycheck to paycheck or being behind on some bills.... and you would hope your significant other could get you out of that tough spot... But nothing is more frustrating then realizing they cant help because they are worse off then you.....
I remember being 16 years old at the bus stop and wouldn't talk to any boys walking or on a bike... my thought process was "TWO WRONGS DON'T MAKE A RIGHT" so there is no reason the both of us need to be in the hot sun waiting for the bus... I needed a boyfriend with a car. LOL!
So i guess in Nutshell... I'm asking Girlfriend... are relationships built on finances... As women do we Strive for a man with success and money... Will we put up with more crap as long as we are comfortable.... you know the saying " If you gonna live in a dog house -- Make sure it's a dog Mansion"....
Whats your take on this.....
A good friend of mine once said " Romance without Finance is a Nuisance"
THESE ARE THE WORDS THAT I LIVE BY....
In my opinion... As a hard working young woman it's hard to wrap your head around a broke man. you think wait a minute if I manage to wake up every morning work 1 or 2 jobs and go to school.. why cant you do the same?
I truly believe Money plays a big role in a relationship...
It cost to wine and dine--while dating.
Money is the number one reason for divorces in America.
Being stressed over bills can affect a relationship.
Men have always been made out to be the PROVIDERS...and i feel like that is something a man should do.
Needless to say ladies... if we want a man to Provide for us we must bring something to the table more then just laying on our back.
Another Reason i believe money plays a major role in relationships is the "STRUGGLE" of being broke. There is nothing like that feeling of living paycheck to paycheck or being behind on some bills.... and you would hope your significant other could get you out of that tough spot... But nothing is more frustrating then realizing they cant help because they are worse off then you.....
I remember being 16 years old at the bus stop and wouldn't talk to any boys walking or on a bike... my thought process was "TWO WRONGS DON'T MAKE A RIGHT" so there is no reason the both of us need to be in the hot sun waiting for the bus... I needed a boyfriend with a car. LOL!
So i guess in Nutshell... I'm asking Girlfriend... are relationships built on finances... As women do we Strive for a man with success and money... Will we put up with more crap as long as we are comfortable.... you know the saying " If you gonna live in a dog house -- Make sure it's a dog Mansion"....
Whats your take on this.....
Friday, April 23, 2010
Girlfriend... Im jast Asking.. Whats up with all these Broken homes?
Girlfriend Im just asking.... Why is it so excepted to be a Baby mamma or Baby Daddy now days?
What happened to planned parent hood?
So this is a pretty "touchy" topic due to the fact that sooooooo many people deal with this issue or live this life style.
I guess maybe i have a bias view because i come from a two parent home...but on the other hand.... there are just some things i think are just common sense.
A.) birth control is always cheaper then a pack of diapers.
B.) the head ache and heart ache can be avoided with planning
( not saying that you will always be 100 % prepared but a lil preparation wouldn't hurt)
C.) A when this child grows up -- do you want them to live in a broken home?
( statistics show that kids that come from 2 parent homes are more likely to succeed in life)
D.) Is this the example you want to show your off spring? -- How can you tell them to wait for marriage or to have children with one person when you haven't done it?
Soo... I guess my question in a NutShell is why is the words "BABY-MAMMA & BABY-DADDY" so GLORIFIED?
I feel as if that's all some young people aspire to be... I go to more baby showers... then bridal showers..
I hear men talking about having a seed... but Never really hear about anyone purchasing a ring...
So who's fault is it.... the women? Are we settling for just a baby in hopes to keep a man... or Is it the men? Do they just want to reproduce without committing to the woman and family life?
or maybe it is our society in a whole ... Have we been conditioned to think that have two parent homes are now obsolete?
What happened to planned parent hood?
So this is a pretty "touchy" topic due to the fact that sooooooo many people deal with this issue or live this life style.
I guess maybe i have a bias view because i come from a two parent home...but on the other hand.... there are just some things i think are just common sense.
A.) birth control is always cheaper then a pack of diapers.
B.) the head ache and heart ache can be avoided with planning
( not saying that you will always be 100 % prepared but a lil preparation wouldn't hurt)
C.) A when this child grows up -- do you want them to live in a broken home?
( statistics show that kids that come from 2 parent homes are more likely to succeed in life)
D.) Is this the example you want to show your off spring? -- How can you tell them to wait for marriage or to have children with one person when you haven't done it?
Soo... I guess my question in a NutShell is why is the words "BABY-MAMMA & BABY-DADDY" so GLORIFIED?
I feel as if that's all some young people aspire to be... I go to more baby showers... then bridal showers..
I hear men talking about having a seed... but Never really hear about anyone purchasing a ring...
So who's fault is it.... the women? Are we settling for just a baby in hopes to keep a man... or Is it the men? Do they just want to reproduce without committing to the woman and family life?
or maybe it is our society in a whole ... Have we been conditioned to think that have two parent homes are now obsolete?
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